むずかしい

Sooo...I guess I couldn't expect Japanese to be all fun and games forever. It looks like the easy part of this course is over for me (and just in time--a cappella auditions just ended and I now actually have time to do some homework). The past few weeks this course has been a breeze--a pleasant one, I might add. Reviewing hiragana characters and very basic greetings was all gain no pain. I knew everything well enough going in so that hiragana workbook sheets were just an opportunity for me to remember the subtle differences between certain characters I had forgotten and to practice my handwriting. Listening and comprehension exercises were equally fun; they were just an opportunity for me to solidify and practice my accent. I have been finding it rewarding to review, solidify, and perfect things I once knew but forgot. It  was starting to feel like learning to actually speak Japanese would happen in my sleep. Like I could take a pill (pill being JPN101) and I'd wake up fluent. "Why hadn't I done this before?" I was starting to ask myself.

Well, as I'm starting to remember this week with the introduction of vocab words in our last listening comprehension worksheet, I have done this before. And there is a reason that I quit.

Japanese is hard! とても　むずかしい！More specifically, Japanese vocab is hard. I even had to look up that word, むずかしい--even though I've been using it since childhood. I'm just not good actually never been good at remembering or memorizing any foreign vocab words. Fortunately in a language like French (which I'm nearly fluent in) the vocab words are so intuitive (so many are cognates or near cognates) that it wasn't a big problem. But I'm quickly realizing that I'm going to have to figure out a system that works for me and fast. Japanese words just don't stick in my head. I'll listen to them and repeat them over and over again, even come up with little tricks to remember the words, but five minutes after I think I learn them, they're gone. And I'm starting to remember why it was I used to get so frustrated with learning this language and why it is that I never learned earlier. It's hard and it takes hard work (and maybe some study tactics that I haven't learned yet).

Anyway I guess for now I'm a little freaked out because I have remembered the reason that I quit this language all those years ago (and the feeling behind it). I just hope that remembering the reason doesn't mean that history will repeat itself. Maybe this time I'll get the hang of memorizing those words. The good news is that with this text book, learning hiragana was easier this time around. So maybe learning vocab will be too. Hope so!

わたしの なまえわ みゆきです（すみません）。

My name is Miyuki Miyagi and I don't speak Japanese. I am tired of the looks of disapproval (often paired with utter confusion) I get when I say that. So that is one of the reasons why I am taking Japanese 101 during my senior year. But it is not the only reason. Of course it will be nice to feel like I finally deserve my name, but mainly I just want to be able to communicate better with my dad. My father is a first-generation Japanese immigrant from Naha city in Okinawa. He came to westchester at the age of 24 to teach karate intending to return to Japan within two years. He then met my mom, a jewish college student taking his karate class, and the rest is history. After living here for about forty years, today my father is of course fluent. As of a few years ago, he is also an American citizen. Nonetheless, he is still very japanese. Having worked in karate dojos and japanese restaurants (including our own) during his entire time in this country, my father has never really become fully comfortable with English and Japanese remains his first and primary language. Indeed I was exposed to a lot of Japanese culture and language growing up as a child. While I did not go to Saturday Japanese school (mom decided on suzuki school instead), I did learn Japanese at home and with a tutor for a short period of time. I was exposed to the language and culture both at home, at my family's japanese restaurant, and in the homes of my best childhood friends who were also Japanese.

That said, I never really learned the language. Last year one of my best friends at school who was fluent in Japanese would sometimes refer to my abilities in Japanese as rainman-like. Yes, I guess I am sort of a Japanese idiot savant. Sometimes I know absolutely nothing and cannot understand even the simplest phrase. Other times I recognize a grammatically-difficult sentence from my childhood and seem to understand complex expressions. While my pronunciation and sporadic comprehension can be misleading, I do not speak or understand enough Japanese to communicate in the language. Since age 5, when Japanese people ask me whether or not I speak the language I reply,　”すこし。”

I realized last year that すこし was no longer enough for me. Trying to speak and learn the language with my Japanese-speaking friend got me interested in the language and culture again and I realized how much I wanted to finally learn about my father's country and culture. More importantly, at the age of 21, I realized how much I wanted to be able to finally communicate with him as an adult in his language. My father picked up on my heightened interest in his language and culture and now our plan is to go visit my family in Okinawa at the end of the year when I graduate. Hopefully this class will prepare me for the trip!

So far I have found much of the material in class to be relatively simple, as much of it (though certainly not all) is review. I have found it rewarding to solidify things I already knew and clear up things I thought I knew but really didn't--everything from pronunciation to the order of brush strokes on hiragana characters. While I was worried how I would cope with the commitment of a 101 language class every day, I actually find that it is consistently one of the most enjoyable parts of my day! I walk out of Japanese class every day happier than when I came in. Hearing the language makes me feel at home. And learning new words and correct pronunciations is fun!

So far the most difficult part of this class has been creating this blog! I am rather technologically challenged and I would like to figure out the formatting a bit more for next time. Can't wait to move past hiragana to learning vocab and grammar!